Reminiscent of the games past, the Lakers stormed out to an early lead (this time 19 points) only to watch it evaporate, like so much water on a hot sidewalk. They then stormed back out to a 14 point lead. Comfortable, right? Yes. If you’re the Celtics. Boston immediately responded by taking a two point lead midway into the fourth quarter. Luckily the Lakers were able to rebound (the ball and game respectively) and finish the Celtics off in game 5, content enough that they didn’t celebrate on the Staples Center Floor. When that is the highlight of a playoff series, you are in some serious trouble. The Lakers, are in serious trouble. This isn’t to say that they couldn’t pull off the greatest come back in basketball history, BUT when your starting center is a 6’5, 150lbs rail, you tend to lose confidence with your inside game…what? You’re telling me Pau is actually 260lbs? And 7’0? And SPAINISH????? Ok, whose fooling who now? So Pau only plays like he’s a junior in middle school when facing KG. This isn’t to say Pau is playing terrible, but it simply isn’t sufficient enough for the NBA finals. Pau’s inability to play inside is the greatest flaw of this Laker team, and that is the lack of an actual center.

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.16.08 GAME 5 OF THE NBA FINALS BOSTON vs. LOS ANGELES"

On this day off for the Dodgers (and let’s face it, this team deserves a day off after playing such inspired baseball for the last two weeks), let’s reminisce about the past few series, and see if we can fix things.

The Dodgers have not won a series since sweeping the Reds on 05/21. Since that day when they were a phenomenal (for the Dodgers) 35-31, they have since gone 6-17, and have reminded more and more people of the 2005 team that had one of the worst records of all time for a Los Angeles Dodger team. There is one big difference from the 2008 and the 2005 time, however. The 2005 team SUCKED. On paper, on the field this team was simply awful. Hell, they even lost games in your wildest dreams. We had to convince ourselves that Milton Bradley would not try to kill fans and reporters, we had to dream that JD Drew wouldn’t be the underachiever that we all knew he was (not to mention an ass), we had to dream that Jose Valantine would be the 3rd Baseman that we had hoped for since Adrian Beltre left. And then there was Jason Phillips. Sweet weasel faced Jason Phillips. The less I say about Hee Sop Choi the better.  All in all, this was a crap team, but I started the season convincing myself that this would not be the case. The Dodgers would storm their way to the World Series this year! There always was hope.

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.16.08 DODGERS PLIGHT AND SUGGESTED TRADE WITH THE INDIANS"

I don’t know where to start. If I were being professional, I would say congrats to the Celtics and be done, but I am not that mature. The Lakers played like the L.A. Sparks without the famed fundamentals. The Lakers played like the Dodgers, if the Dodgers were forced at gunpoint to play shuffleboard (where Jeff Kent would be the MVP). Considering that Matt Kemp was a star basketball player in high school, is it honestly too late to draft the guy? Because seriously, he would probably play better perimeter defense than ANY of the Lakers, who honestly call this their profession. I mean they get paid to play like this. PAID. MILLIONS. TO PLAY LIKE THIS.

 

The Lakers could pay me a million dollars for the series and I would guard Paul Pierce. Well I would guard Paul Pierce as well as any of the other Lakers did. When I use the term “guard” I use the term loosely because neither myself or any of the Lakers perimeter defenders could or have stopped Paul Pierce. I would try though, by doing such huge groundbreaking things like, I don’t know PUTTING MY ARMS IN THE AIR, and not waving them like I just don’t care. I would put my arms in the air to try to contest a shot, or slow Pierce down from moon-walking to the basket for the easy lay-up/foul/assist combo he has been dropping all series. This goes directly to Vlad and Walton who played some of the worst perimeter defense I’ve seen since game 5, and game 4 and game 3 and these entire playoffs.

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.18.08: Lakers vs. Celtics, 2-Pac, Biggie, and breakdown"

On the eve of the Dodgers winning three games in a row (Joe Torre: “We won a game today, if we win again tomorrow, that’s called a ‘winning streak’”) for the first time roughly a century, the great Jeff Passan over at Yahoo! Sports has his annual “All-Overpaid and Underpaid Team”. He is spot on with his selections that I can see, but this seriously should have been labeled “The Los Angeles Dodgers”. Out of every player in the league mind you, the Dodgers manage to crack this list a whopping 4 times out of an available 9 positions. Jeff is right by stating what the Dodger contracts lack in length, they make up for in girth (how many guys have actually tried to claim that, by the way?), and that in no way makes them better. The Dodgers have the enormous problem of overpaying for mediocrity, and a glimpse further on this list shows that the Dodgers already added, or tried to add (if you believe the rumors, and of course I do, for this argument) another 6 of these players. While Dodger stupidity with the pocketbook is nothing new, let’s look at these players and see why they aren’t Dodgers or won’t be for long. Since Jeff already astutely pointed out the flaws of Andruw Jones, Nomar, Kent, and Schmitt, I’ll avoid rehashing his points and add anything else I can to the conversation. 

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.20.08: Dodger contracts and the Worst in Baseball"

Hot of the presses comes word of Nomar Garciaparra (my FAVORITE Dodger) being diagnosed with a gene problem that causes him to heal slower than a normal man. Who is this guy the ANTI-Wolverine ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Healing_factor)? That has seriously got to be the worst mutant power of all time, but the funniest part of all of this is that he has been diagnosed by his PHYSICAL THERAPIST. These guys aren’t doctors! Nothing against physical therapists, but really, Nomar is more disabled than Lt. Dan ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109830/) and has spent more time on the disabled list than the Raiders have been an embarrassment, and it took them this long to find out that he has the skeletal structure composed of Faberge egg? I like Nomar as a person, as he seems like a cool guy and it must be incredibly frustrating losing so many years to injury, but man, if I was the Dodgers, I would be greatly annoyed that nobody realized until now that they had signed Samuel L. Jackson from “Unbreakable” to play baseball for them for 3 years.      

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.23.08 Around the World of Sports in 80 (or so) Sentences"

First things first, the Dodgers won a game against the American League! Not only that, but it was a complete game shut out by “blink and you’ll miss him” starter Eric Stultz, who is making Brad Penny, Hiroki Koruda, and Jason Schmidt look as worthless as their arms (in all fairness, Koruda is pretty much EXACTLY what the Dodgers and fans expected him to be). Without knowing when or how the Dodgers will win again, considering that this team is as inconsistent as an Tommy Lasorda’s bowel movements, I spend today rejoicing as the Dodgers are now 2-6 against the American League and the National League is a combined 12-infinity against AL as well. While it feels that there has been a dominance of the AL over the NL has been progressively consistent since the new millennium, although the exact opposite is true with the NL posting a 1,104-1095 record over the AL. Since the 2005 season however, the AL hold the advantage with a 292-213 advantage. Never is it more clear in any sport that baseball is held pretty strictly to the “law of large numbers”.

Continue reading "IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY 06.26.08: Dodgers and the law of mediocrity"