On the eve of the Dodgers playing the Giants a few hours from now, and the NBA turning on it’s head with constant movements, I find myself watching: The 2008 Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship. I always seem to catch myself watching this every year, totally disgusted with what I’m watching and with myself for being so interested. This is one of the reasons the rest of the world hates what America stands for. Gluttony. People are eating more hot dogs in 12 minutes than the rest of the world sees in their entire lifetime. ESPN tries to make this a legitimate “sporting” event like rock, paper, scissors tournament, but generally people don’t buy it. Not even the “athletes” believe themselves to be partaking in anything but a gorge-fest.

Intrigue arises as there is an “eat-off” due to a tie with last years winner, Joey Chestnut, retaining his title as being the fastest hot dog eater in the world, while Takeru Kobayashi (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Takeru_Kobayashi) hunches over the table stunned at his loss. I really can’t make any fat person jokes because honestly Kobayashi’s interpreter is the fattest person on that stage. All of these people are lean, and in great shape, and I stand stunned that I can’t lose weight to get where I want to, while all of these people eat 60 hot dogs in one sitting and are ripped like some sort of videogame character.

The announcers try to compare Joey Chestnut to Tiger Woods and Tom Brady, and do so without laughing themselves into a coronary. If the point of this competition was to make me want hot dogs though, it worked, because since the first time since I accidentally watched clips of the Vern Troyer tape, I am craving hot dogs. They recap the eating competition and I wonder how they can make something as sexy as eating a hot dog, so gross. I’ll see you next year Nathan’s.

DODGER BASEBALL AT IT’S BEST

Since the Dodgers were no hit (not officially) and won the game against the Angel’s, they proceeded to lose the next 2 games and play as terrible as we’ve seen them play. I don’t know who should have been more embarrassed at that loss, the Dodgers or the Angels. The Angel’s have been touted as having one of the best small ball/big ball line-ups in the league, but didn’t really look like it that series. The part that gets to me is that the Angel’s scored one run that ENTIRE SERIES and still WON A GAME. If I was the Dodgers that would be enough to demote myself back to Triple A. I don’t know how you look yourself in the mirror after that. In a series where you are no hit and win, and don’t sweep a team who scored one run in the entire 3 games, you really should reevaluate your status as a major league player. Even considering that the Dodgers have roughly $80 million in payroll on the DL right now, they are basically starting their Triple A team.

I also consider if Nomar’s genetic injury prone disorder is contagious and he has been sharing towels with the all the veterans of the team. A scheme by Matt Kemp and James Loney to take over the team? We can only hope.

In more optimistic news, the Dodgers have since won 3 straight games and Andruw Jones and Nomar are coming back to stink up the line-up. At least I can use all the fat jokes that I couldn’t use with the hot dog eating contest when talking about Andruw now.

Considering the long weekend, I’ll be back on Monday to talk all things NBA, and prepare myself for my iPhone. Oh yeah!