No, not just big-name PGA Tour golfers like Tiger Woods or Vijay Singh, but large men that announcers feel the need to point out. As Mark Calcavecchia was walking to his next shot at the Mercedes-Benz Championship, the broadcasters could not help commenting on his physique. This was not only one time either folks – it happened each and every time he was shown making a shot. They simply couldn’t resist and had to mention how heavy he is - cracking jokes about exercise and dietary choices. This phenomenon is not only reserved for Mr. Calcavecchia but haunts every golfer that is not built like Tiger Woods or Zach Johnson. John Daly and Craig “The Walrus” Stadler certainly get their share of ribbing as well.

Alright, I am a staunch advocate for exercise and living healthy but why must these so called professionals continue to taunt “the big guy”? Did these people not get enough grief from the kids in school? What makes the announcers so freaking perfect that they have the right to judge anyone? Let’s not forget, this is a sport that was dominated by drink-swilling white dudes that were a bit out of shape until Tiger Woods came along.

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NFL Playoffs!? That can only mean one thing – bandwagon season! Now that my team #1 and #2 are done for the season, its time to jump on the way only a true NFL football fan can.

My Tampa Bay Buccaneers played an exceptional first quarter today and then decided to fall asleep on me. Too bad the game has four quarters! Argh! I really thought they could make something happen this year. My #1 team(s) the San Francisco 49ers and the Oakland Raiders never even made it to the playoffs - so the time has come for auxiliary cheering methods – jump on the bandwagon! I have planned out who I will be rooting for next week for sure (remaining season afterward to be determined):

Go San Diego Chargers! This is my number one choice of course, being a Southern California native. LaDainian Tomlinson is not only remarkable, but a role model with his quiet confidence. You never see him trash talking, he simply does his job and does it well! I am fully allowed to root for them as they were once the Los Angeles Chargers and I actually lived in Del Mar for a period. Also, I have been to Seau’s and had a cigar (alright, he isn’t there anymore but that’s not the point)!

Continue reading "Bandwagon Season!"

Growing up in Los Angeles, the only team that anyone ever talked about when it came to the NBA was the Los Angeles Lakers. I remember the whole city being completely obsessed when it came to Lakers basketball. Billboards, commercials, and fast-food promotions further shoved the team into the forefront of everyone’s mind. Popular bands wrote songs about them and select celebrities lined the courtside seats.

The Los Angeles Clippers came to town in 1984 from San Diego (and Buffalo before that). Nobody paid too much attention at first and you could basically get free tickets with the purchase of 5 gallons of gasoline. They’ve had their peaks and valleys over the years and enjoy larger attendance numbers today but you can still get tickets pretty cheap.  Sometimes still free with the purchase of something else. 

Continue reading "Lakers? Clippers?"

I knew they could do it! They had their number earlier in the year and they did it again today! The San Diego Chargers upset the Indianapolis Colts in a 28-24 victory that came down to the wire at the RCA Dome. Shawne Merriman and Antonio Cromartie were key in the defense against Peyton Manning, both making big plays when it really counted. I was truly worried when LaDainian Tomlinson went out of the game and even more pessimistic when Philip Rivers had to be sidelined – but the rest of the team made me a believer! I take back every less than flattering statement I have ever uttered about Norv Turner!  He really is an NFL coach that deserves respect.  

Next up, San Diego faces a challenging match-up in New England against the steamroller Patriots. They have weak spots; they just need to be exploited. The Chargers defense has as good of a chance as any to shut down the Pats offense. I know I’ll be having a heart attack or nervous breakdown through every play in the game. And to think, I thought the Chargers were done halfway through the season!

Continue reading "Go Bolts!"

Besides being an exceptional athlete, Indianapolis Colts QB Peyton Manning is totally in on the fact that he can play a very believable dork. He may come across as a simple, laid-back country boy - but this guy is as smart as they come when it means marketing himself. Did you see him host Saturday Night Live? His United Way spoof was absolutely hysterical! Again, I am not an Indianapolis Colts fan by any stretch of the imagination. I just can’t help finding Peyton to be a truly side-splitting character!

Here are my five favorite Peyton Manning commercials:

1. Priceless Pep Talks: Comic timing and sarcasm look like they are simply second nature for Peyton. In this series, he explains why you won’t have rock-hard abs and how to get over the embarrassment of driving a minivan.

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At this point in the NFL season, many fans need encouragement to continue since their favorite team has been knocked out of the playoffs. As you sit there in your Peyton Manning or Tony Romo jersey, why not lighten up your day and play a little drinking game when you watch the rest of the season unfold?

I like to call this the “Innuendo Game”. The prime broadcasts for this are those with the team of Joe Buck and Troy Aikman or the ever-phallic John Madden and Al Michaels duo. I am not sure whether John and Al are calling any more games this season, but I know Joe and Troy are on this weekend.

How do you play? Simple, every time one of the announcers makes a questionable remark – take a drink! Madden is great for this. I’ve heard him say things like:

Continue reading "Playoffs and Super Bowl Drinking Game"

As we near the last – sniff – weekend of the NFL season to decide who is going to the Super Bowl, I realize that empty feeling is coming back. You dedicated fans know what I am talking about! It’s that feeling you get when your beloved jersey gets ripped, your lucky hat disappears, or the store is out of your favorite beer. Yep – that vacant, lonely feeling that begins to creep in this same time every year. Sure, we savor this last weekend and then spend two weeks planning for the big day. Afterward, we are numb and feign interest in the Pro Bowl, just kidding ourselves that it is an actual game.

This season has been pretty wild! I got to attend one game – in San Francisco – and it was electric! I was even more excited when I realized that it was Bryant Young’s last home game before retirement. I’ve been ultra-impressed with Brett Favre, David Garrard, LaDainian Tomlinson, and even Terrell Owens. We’ve seen great commercials, inspiring coaches, and the loss of iconic figures.

Continue reading "It’s almost over!!!!"

I was not a believer in Eli Manning until the last few games I watched him play. I seriously had the New York Giants written off as Super Bowl contenders. Also, I assumed that Eli would never actually come into his own and learn how to be effective in the NFL. Written off as nepotism, I was one of those naysayers that figured he would be a back-up QB sooner rather than later.

I was wrong!

Of course, he is not his brother Peyton Manning but is quite a formidable player that deserves respect. When he ripped my heart out by not committing his then-signature turnovers when he played against my Tampa Bay Buccaneers, I was forced to take notice. I did not remember seeing him play so well before that.

So congratulations New York Giants fans! The last time your team was in the Super Bowl they were defeated by the Baltimore Ravens. They certainly have a tall order this time – but it is doable! With statistics and the law of averages on their side, they have a shot at ruining perfection for the New England Patriots.

Continue reading "I stand corrected!"

I remember when Shaq came on the scene as the big guy on the Orlando Magic. He had the silly rap and the even sillier movies but was quite an admirable player. When he came to Los Angeles to play for my hometown Lakers – I was so pumped! The Big Aristotle was awesome to watch and added to the mystique and legend of the team.

Later, the feuds with Kobe Bryant were quite depressing. The year that the team lost both Phil Jackson and Shaquille O’Neal was one of the low points in the team’s history. I remember feeling very pessimistic about the future… Well, Phil Jackson returned but Shaq did not. I remember that first pre-season game that Phil came back to us. Lucky to be in attendance, I was part of the standing ovation that rejoiced in his homecoming.

Continue reading "Shed a Tear for Shaq"

Yeah, you heard me – the Los Angeles Raiders. This is the team that still lives in my mind. The only team to bring my hometown a Super Bowl win. Sure, I follow other clubs in the NFL now. It is hard not to when yours has deserted you! At any rate, I drive around town in my black car with the black Raiders license plate frames in honor of days long passed…

Now, oh my goodness! Have you seen the state that the team is in today? Ugh! Al Davis is back to his nutty tricks and has asked Lane Kiffin to resign. Huh? Really? Yeah, the Oakland Raiders have turned in an embarrassing season where they were nearly last in every measurable category. Since the departure of John Gruden, they have been on a depressing, downward spiral. I wasn’t very excited about Norv Turner, but he proved me wrong by taking the San Diego Chargers almost there this season. This tells me he wasn’t all bad. But asking Lane Kiffin to resign? I don’t get it? Surely he will be able to get it together. I mean, after all, he is the son of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers defensive genius Monte Kiffin. I am not so sure that asking him to leave is the answer to the team’s problems. Maybe asking the owner to resign would be more fruitful?

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You New England Patriots players are a laugh riot! Imagine, Donté Stallworth or Wes Welker taking over as quarterback from Tom Brady. Actually, it was rather amusing. Each of these players calmly answered the speculation of their MVP’s health by saying Bill Belichick had asked them to take over the helm. Each never flinched, as if to say how absurd the speculation is. I agree, Tom Brady is likely just fine and will play remarkably in Glendale, Az on February 3. In case you haven’t noticed, QBs often play when hurt – case in point Philip Rivers. Don’t forget that the offensive line gives Brady all day to throw the ball, so even if his leg hurts a bit he’ll likely play up to par.

Speaking of funny – did you hear Michael Strahan? At the New York Giants press conference he owned up to dirty ball. I guess someone asked him whether there were “dirty” players in the NFL. He emphatically replied – DUH! In fact, this defensive star replied that he laughs every time he hears a news report of a dirty player. They are all dirty as far as he is concerned! You have to be a bit of a nut to play in the NFL according to Michael. He admitted that he takes cheap shots when he can. You gotta love honesty! At least someone has the nerve to say it!

Continue reading "Hardy Har Har – How to Laugh at the Super Bowl"

Call me a traitor to women everywhere, but I don’t want chocolates, flowers, or lingerie. Please don’t expect me to get excited about dinner and a movie. Don’t be surprised when I scoff at the notion of taking a limousine ride to some “romantic location”. Seriously, I won’t even get mad if you completely forget that it is Valentine’s Day. Chances are, I’ll forget myself until the day is almost over and I look at the date.

Yes, I am dead serious. I think it is totally absurd to say that I only love my spouse on one day of the year. Why should we be together if we aren’t in love every day (which, I am happy to report, we are)! So if you run into my husband, tell him that this is the list of what I really want for Valentine’s Day:

Continue reading "5 Things I Want for Valentine’s Day"